art VS responsibility?

so, as a young graduate i’m unsure how to navigate this world of opportunity. i have experience in many fields and industries. i’ve been commissioned/freelanced by many cool organizations and companies. and yet, despite having shows, still keeping up-to-date with the art scene and gossip i can’t help but think i’m failing. i can’t get a job i reallllllllyyyyyy want. i want the freedom, and the flexibility; but i also want the pride in having a career that can take me places or help others. yet, i have this bizarre ideal in my head that so long as i keep on making artwork and organizing things then my life/career/prospects will increase. will it though?

i need a job that i can support myself, and help my mom and bro out. none of this minimum wage for going no-where. rent-a-slave.com. but what do i do? should i take the arty lifestyle and risk going for broke. or should i concentrate on trying to make a career? and essentially have something with crushed dreams of what-if. or i mean, it could go both ways – i could end up with nothing at all!

i wish i had a sign. or some advise. but for now, i’m still young so i’m chasing the dream. (attempting to be an artist)

 

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