Let my vacation come fucking faster!

Today I’ve had one of the worst days in like…. 3 months? Which is GREAT going for me. And although it hasn’t been ultimately traumatic, I made myself look abit like a cock and sobbed down the phone to Richie, and did that mumblely type of talking just before you cry type of talkin’ to my manager as I ran out for my “break”.

This RARELY happens. I only ever cry on my own. And I usually make an excuse up 2 do it.. so for example I’ll watch a movie I know makes me breakdown, so if anyone happens 2 come into my room I’m like – ahh its the movie!!

I feel stupid when it happens, but I kinda like it as well. The more you don’t want to cry, the more it seems to happen.. abit like when you’re going to be sick. And it’s such a relief 4 it 2 happen when it does, it becomes kind of addictive. The relief – abit like when you realllllllllly need the bathroom.

Anyways, not only this but I stressed myself out. I’ve been asked 2 do this “comission” if you like, and it will be printed in a book. It’s nothing big but for me the opportunity and the fact I’ve been asked is FUCKING HUGE. BIG DEALIO YO!

I don’t want to make this person think that they’ve made a wrong decision 2 ask me, nor do I want 2 fuck this opportunity up… and I don’t wanna waste my own time either. I’ve been working non-stop since Thursday and I have 2 work 2moz, monday and Tuesday aswell. So it has given me little time 2 really do this shizzle!!!! And cuz i’m eager 2 please and I respect this person totally k-r-a-z-yily, I’ve built the pressure up in my head 2 the point that being virtually attacked at work became the cherry on the cake.

But i did buy a scanner 2 scan the work in and some Ben and Jerry’s Phish Food.

Anyways, rant and panic over (i think) tomorrow is my leaving doo. More on that later

I shall update ya later on the commission, i don’t wanna brag just in case it never happens. Don’t wanna disappoint myself too much, if I don’t type it – it’s not a real thing lol.

Published by smizz

I've had this blog since I was 17. I use it process thinking & work. It's changed with how my life has changed. Artist → Re-evaluating life→ Rad Oncology graduate + public health worker→ @lab4living PhD-er → Want 2 make a positive difference → Rule-Breaker → LIVE DRAWZ! → councillor! → Loves cities → rides fixie → adventures → wanna be ramen master → <3 Tokyo + NYC

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