5 ways how to make an artist depressed.

1) Compare yourself to artists who have “made it” and are well respected. Compare ideas and what they had already achieved at your age and see where your similarities lay. Changes are that, you suck.

2) Tell them repeatedly that, ” they’ll probably never make it, live in avid poverty and work in a call centre with a degree that can’t be used and a £26,000 debt to pay 0ff.” This is made more official if you tell them about what their contemporaries are now doing, a year after they have graduated.

3) Tell them that you just don’t get their work, that it is shallow and shit. They’ll pretend that clearily you’re the under educated one, or that is exactly what it’s supposed to do – but secretly it hurts.

4) Find rules (even if they are supposed to be funny and ironic) that apply to the artists practice like this:

” Rule number # 7:  No musing, self-righteous, megalomaniacal architect-urban planner-social theorist systems managers. No informal use of ink jet prints, whose only purpose is to fool the public into thinking that being an architect is as cool as being an artist. ” And watch it work…

5) When they are asking for feedback, just go, ” Yeah it’s great, it’s amazing” because this pisses them off too!


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